She told of her sister in law who was diagnosed a few months ago with terminal brain cancer at age 62. It affects her as well as her sister in law. She said it changes the dynamics. She noticed over time here sister in law going through denial, anger, and other stages of grief. They sound like they have a good together for those dynamics to operate within. A together can be a place, supple and changing.
:- Doug.
It’s not what we talk about; it’s that we intend to converse, to together.
:- Doug.
People can be asked, “Is there a deeper aspect to that?” and then we must remember that perhaps they are not used to thinking in these directions. Larger and deeper is new territory for some folks. So be ready to suggest some ways, to help people ponder. People are able…and more than a little willing.
:- Doug.
I cannot promise that revenues will go up, nor that turnover will go down. This is specifically outside the realm of numbers and measurement. This is human and therefore qualitative stuff. What is the value of a good moment in the life of a resident, patient, and staff member?
:- Doug.
This is a valuable thing, to be able to establish a connection—a bright spot in the day—with another human.
:- Doug.
Get conversations started. Conversations of eyes, gestures, stories, songs, movement. Do we really need words to connect with someone? What is conversation about but loving humanity, helping someone matter?
:- Doug.
The purpose of the conversation exercise is to let you experience that talking about death—even your own death—is not scary—and you will not die from it!
:- Doug.
What are the sources of meaning in your life? love, work, history, family, friends, pain, joy, creativity, responsibility, beauty, truth, goodness, humor, hugs, food, smells, music, lessons to give, stories to tell, people you need to forgive, be forgiven by, lead, encourage, say goodbye to, assign tasks to, travels, napping, making your life whole and rounded and complete….
:- Doug.
Kairos time can also be the pro-found moment. The professional can find the moment, and in that, the profound.
:- Doug.
We are on the brink of civil war if anyone is elected President. Who wins? The ones with the guns. Our side loses.
:- Doug.
Conversation is easy. All it takes is cracking open your chest and handing to the other your beating heart.
:- Doug.
We are in grave danger of having two candidates at impossibly opposite ends of the political spectrum. The danger is that people may feel they have no choice but civil war.
:- Doug.
Can I allow disturbances in life to take me off my plotted course and into creativity and novelty? How many times have I noticed that mistakes gave me better ways to do and be!
:- Doug.
Tugged we each are between doing the usual thing—say earning a living—and doing your best thing. More sharply: doing your calling which means relying on others (family, tribe, nation?) to pick up your slack when you fail and being the one to pick up others when they fail. This is the prodigal father again, yes? The stay at the grindstone brother angry that he has to support the one who set out in the world and fell flat on his face: faced by the progenitor who loved them both with his all.
:- Doug.
Perturbation → disorder and order → emergence → life stretches for novelty → Do I allow the waters of my life to be troubled?
:- Doug.
There is that voice which says you have something special to bring to the world. But even in our individualist times there sounds the overpowering hum beneath all sound. Do not be odd, do not pull away, this is the way we go, if you go some other you will be in the wilderness, alone, alone: you will die! So we don’t quit our job. Then that voice. The anguish.
The anguish of the human. Here is life, in the wrestling of these two.
Unacknowledged. But were we to hear and hold the battling too! Might we, scathed, be?
:- Doug.
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