FootprintsintheWind.com

What research might you have to do to elder someone well?

:- Doug.

What is the need grandchildren will have that you can fill? What do you see that the middlers don’t see?

:- Doug.

Don’t choose. Open. I set before you life and death. Open to both. And what’s beyond.

:- Doug.

We are the pioneers. People will learn from us what eldering is. Even the Quakers who have such a word do not see in it what I see in it—something akin to grandmothering and grandfathering. Only larger.

How is it bigger than grandmothering? We have a larger focus: not simply a stash of cookies, or tutoring in Spanish, but development of the person, the soul, the people, or maybe larger still.

:- Doug.

Why would we want to elder another? Do we seek to transform them? Us? Some purpose larger than that?

:- Doug.

Be real.

:- Doug.

Did you think when you married him you could tame his ego?

:- Doug.

Slow down and savor.

:- Doug.

Maybe the highest calling of the elder is to elder someone dying.

:- Doug.

There is a depth beyond which we seldom go. Let us screw up our courage…and our imagination.

:- Doug.

What are the mysteries of life? Do they dismay you or lift you or something else?

:- Doug.

Have you had a good funeral experience? A meaningful loss? Even deeper: a loss that you have survived? Deeper still: something that was either negative or positive, perhaps even meaningless, that is still a mystery to you? What’s there, for which to be grateful?

:- Doug.

What’s a sadness that was profound growth for you?

:- Doug.

Openings for growth I will make, if you will go through with me.

:- Doug.

Footprints in the Wind^sm # 1684

You are related to
say 100 others
take you away
and some of
their relations fall
in this way among a host
you are the center
of the universe
and without you
the universe collapses
becomes different
and this one ends

remember that you interpret
your world into existence
it is only out there
plus
in here
and in this way as well
you at the center
without you nil

who are you?
actually you are not
not at all
you are a knot
in the continual
folding and unfolding
fabric we call
universe
once again
you at the center
of no thing
the buzz of the bee

Please pass it on.

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We need to tell the truth, even if no one else does. Our truth. Especially hear. Hear this truth.

:- Doug.

You don’t have to be afraid. You don’t have to pump up your ego, or make us fear you. Share some of yourself so we can love you. Love to overcome your fear. You don’t have to be afraid. Anymore.

:- Doug.

Throw in something good now.

:- Doug.

Eldering is a state of mind, a stage of life, something you do, and someone you are.

:- Doug.

A giving in receiving
grace in being cared for:
our presence softly

:- Doug.

There is a world of difference between fallings short and falling shorts.

:- Doug.

We forgive ourselves when we say we have fallen short of our own dreams and aspirations and we accept ourselves as valuable anyway. At one with ourselves we are reconciled to ourselves.

:- Doug.

A new reality it is when to people our daring invitation is “go deeply;” it breaks in upon us saying the older “tell them what you want them to do” is not ultimately enough.

:- Doug.