directing traffic

To our good friends–

How do I get to this notion I have, what is it, how to express it? G-d seen not as Grampa Goodgifts, who knows all and gives all, but rather who challenges all, seeks to expand us. This is close. But a God who simply sits on a throne and directs traffic is too small for my heart. G*d is a needle, a haircloth shirt, a burr in our shoe. A G*d who says David is a person after my heart has allowed for David (and many other people) to be a panorama of people, some dark, some light, some large, some shriveled, some delightful, some tiresome, some mean, some a thousand thousand other ways. G*d is a challenge: a loving, cheer leading challenger.

This picture of directing traffic in some small way captures the idea. What is the role we see for G*d in our lives? G*d is the between: us and others; us and the world: the medium of transfer. G*d is a help from trouble, but is not just a sick nurse, either. G*d is a risk-taker, risking his beloved world and all his children in the hands of each new one whose foot he sets upon this planet. All are extensions of G*d, so G*d is risking G*d and the crucifixion anew of G*d’s only child (you, me, her, him) each moment: a heart thrown into the mill chute is apt to get ground to pieces. G*d is our opener and stretcher. G*d expects something of us: not as payment, but as a parent hopes. G*d is not God. Whatever our picture of God, it is smaller than the reality. G*d needs us. I am not sure why, but our existence proves it. We are not playthings, either, but children, and friends. So G*d is our mother and our brother.

What are we to make of this? We are to make of life our challenge and get in there throwing ourselves into the mix. We are to listen for the larger challenges, the things that scare us. These are of G*d.

Can you see G*d larger than that? Can you see yourself larger? Truth is larger, ever.

:- Doug.

Published in: Conversations | on May 11th, 2006 | No Comments »

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